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| Catherine E. Sears, Esq. |
Over
the summer, I took the Virginia bar exam.
I was terrified, of course – the bar is a two-day exam which covers an
overwhelming number of complex topics. Only after passing the exam could I begin
practicing the livelihood for which I have been training for the past three
years. As if I was not already acutely
aware of this, I received a notification from my student loan provider the day
before the exam to remind me that my mountain of law school loans would be
coming due soon. Needless to say, it was
a stressful time.
Despite
the high stakes and the mental exhaustion, however, I felt a remarkable sense
of calm as I walked toward the testing center on the first day of the exam. This was due, in no small part, to my
faith. However, I also attribute this
peace of mind to the thoroughness with which I prepared for the exam. I had studied for 40+ hours per week for the
past two-and-a-half months, ever since my law school graduation. I selected the most well-regarded test
preparation program with the best reputation for success, and, according to the
company’s metrics, I completed enough assignments within that program to become
statistically more likely to pass. I had
an amazingly supportive group of family and friends encouraging me along the
way. I studied in a friendly environment
with minimal distractions, and I avoided talking to other bar-preppers about
their studying experience to keep myself from making comparisons that would
hurt my self-esteem. All in all, I had
done everything within my power to plan ahead and be prepared, which allowed me
to face the unpleasantness of the exam with as much peace of mind as was
possible.
I
firmly believe that being prepared and staying calm in the face of a difficult
situation go hand in hand.
Unfortunately, we will all face stressful situations in our lives. Although only some people are crazy enough to
subject themselves to the bar exam, we all must face our own mortality. Many of us will also need to cope with the
decline of loved ones – our spouse, our parents, our siblings, or our friends.
Although
I am still new to the field of estate planning, I have already heard countless
stories from families about their experiences in caring for sick loved ones or
in trying to sort through a family member’s affairs after death. Though their individual stories are
different, they share a common theme: how much easier it is to face this
difficult, emotionally-charged situation if the proper estate planning
documents had been executed and a plan was in place. Recently, a client told me about how
emotionally difficult it was to make medical decisions for her incapacitated father,
who had left no guidance on the treatment he would have wanted. In addition to facing the sadness that comes
with a loved one’s illness and death, this woman was forced to try to read her
father’s mind and faced mental anguish over not knowing whether her dad would
have approved of the medical decisions she was making on his behalf. To keep this stress from passing to her own
children, the woman signed a health care power of attorney to give her kids not
only the authority to make these difficult decisions, but also the guidance
they will need to determine what decisions to make.
So
much of life is unknown. After taking
the bar exam, I had to wait three agonizing months to get the results, which
gave me ample time to fear the unknown situations that the future brings and
contemplate “worst case scenarios.” Instead
of worrying about the stressful unknown, however, let us at The Peninsula
Center help you make a plan to give you and your loved ones some much-needed
peace of mind.
Finally,
in case you’re curious, I recently learned that I passed the bar!! It just goes to show that working hard and making
a plan can truly pay off.
